Archive | November, 2013

Hide and Seek

29 Nov


Last night we went Black Friday shopping at midnight.  Every year we go to the same outlet mall and walk around for hours, freezing and laughing as we bounce from store to store, the Christmas melodies of Judy Garland and Frank Sinatra crooning us along.  Alex’s family met us at the outlet mall, a good hour from our home, and we all walked together, commenting on our finds and giving unsolicited advice on possible purchases.

At about 4 in the morning I was done.  I literally couldn’t take one more step and opted instead to sit on a bench outside of Calvin Klein and smoke a cigarette while drinking a fountain Dr. Pepper.  I sat on the bench in the vicious cold with an instrumental version of Silent Night playing over my head.  Although I was absolutely freezing and exhausted, I was totally at peace.  In fact, I couldn’t remember a time in the past few months that my mind had been so free of distraction.  I sat for several moments watching the other shoppers laugh and speed along, most commenting on the cold or their purchases, and for a moment, I was not of their world, but just a fixture decorating their journey.  I was hidden.

And it was nice.  Sometimes I just like to hide. 

For now,



Thanksgiving With Dad

28 Nov


Last night, while I was slowly falling asleep, I was thinking back on past Thanksgivings, trying to conjure up some of my favorite memories.  It’s interesting that as you get older, some traditions stay the same, but as people exit this world, the holiday takes on new shapes with new players and less characters.  Such is the story of holidays in my life.

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The Perfect Thanksgiving Drinking Game!

27 Nov


Before I start this post, let me state 2 clear facts!

1. This post, and game suggested, is completely meant in jest.  I do not drink, so if you are one of my many alcoholic friends, please laugh with me.  And if you are one of my friends who is able to drink successfully, have at it!

2. This post is dedicated  to my cousin Caroline who deserves to get very drunk!

Now…on with the show!

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When People Talk Shit About Me…

26 Nov


Someone asked me today what I do when people talk shit about me behind my back.  Who me? No one ever talks about me behind my back…Haha! Actually, I have a very simple solution to this huge problem.

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The Gay Boy

25 Nov

Peter 1

I sit up late at night on the computer and read other people’s blogs, diving into the lives of people in faraway cities that I don’t even know.  Some of them talk about knitting or raising kids, while others talk about relationships or co-op farming.  I usually just follow a tagged word and read all of the blogs on that subject.  I like having an insiders view into someones mind, kind of like peeking into their soul.  After all, I’ve always been a snoop.

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And in The End; 25 Lessons at the End of a Life

23 Nov

mom_peterismsLast week would have been my mother’s 70th birthday, had she not died 6 years ago.  I’ve been thinking a lot about her lately, mostly about all of the wisdom she passed on to me in indirect ways.  My mother was a teacher, not only professionally but also in her daily interactions with people.  Often misunderstood and even sometimes bothersome to others, she could easily ramble intellectually about a line from a song or a passage in a book and how it was so important to remember to live a better life.  During one of our last conversations, my mother quoted her favorite Beatles song, The End, saying, “And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.”  This is how she taught.  I look back on my life with my mother and know now she was teaching me how to live a passionate life even until the very end.  I believe she wanted me to live a life composed of magic and dreams fulfilled.  Having adhered to the following rules she bestowed upon me, my life has never fallen short of her dreams for me.  My only hope is that she’s up there somewhere watching.

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20 Differences Between Same-Sex and Heterosexual Marriages!

22 Nov


Recently, a client shared that her daughter was doing a Sociology project in high school about same-sex marriage and wanted to know if I would be willing to write down 20 differences between same-sex and heterosexual marriages, not including the given genetic differences,  based on the fact that I was gay and married and also worked with both same-sex and heterosexual couples in my practice.  I laughed heartily only to find that she didn’t understand why I was so amused.  I explained, that having never been in a heterosexual marriage, only having been married to my husband Alex, I couldn’t share my experience in comparison.  “But most of your friends are straight couples”, she said, “So surely you must see the differences and similarities between the two groups?”  I laughed again.  “Please”, she begged.  “You would really be helping my daughter and also helping teenagers to be less judemental.” I didn’t have the heart to tell her that teenagers are by in large 90% less judgemental than your average adult neighbor.

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